Picture of Cracks in the Sidewalk

Cracks in the Sidewalk

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     Touching wet cement, repercussions of, and how it ended.

Product Specifications
Word Count 1108
File Format Book will be delivered as a PDF download.
Current rating is 4.08. Total votes 13.
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Cracks In The Sidewalk
Should I be critical about this short story?  No way.  What a gift of writing you have.  My favorite lines; "that guy is putting new cement in, as the rebirth of a gentle fleck of our community...." also "Can we stroke our identities in the setting solution?"  There are so many more lines like those that just took me through the story.  They just seemed to float so effortlessly through the nooks and crannies of my mind.  Maybe someday you can write a book about the adventures of J.A.M.  You're a favorite author in my book.

From: Albert Abanes | Created on: 1/16/2013 10:39:59 AM

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Jolting!
hahah, i enjoyed it, you are one fantastic writer. i love the gothic and yours has that crepy feeling near the end? it starst off like any other story on adventure like the Huck Finn and Tom Sawyerbut it just transform into a nightmarish denouement.

from an argument on what name their group is to be called, three (disunited) children, Anya, Jared, an Michel, appraoched a builder and have their initials engraved in the setting cement that has just been built on their side walk? but as they do so, the ground open under them and they are swallowed up. this story is a blend of homour and the gothic, if one understands at the end that he the very reader will come up with no answers if the children were swallowed up into a subterranean cave or if it was just a dream as their mother says. the story ends with a horrid paragraph which cancels out all what the reader could have been thinking? it is so well written, straight to the point, no characetr development but a strong sense of situational development which i like so much. thumbs up

From: Nforche Gerald | Created on: 10/31/2012 5:36:32 AM

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Different
This story definitely has a unique twist to it but I have to agree with nearly everything written below. Even though I am a fan of long words and what some might call awkward writing styles, this may be a bit overboard. I agree especially with the recent review that suggested cutting down on the elaboration in the athorial voice and questioned the meaning of the end of the story. It does seem that there should be something more, perhaps an elaboration of the significance of the crack in the sidewalk? I don't really know what else to write as everyone else seems to have it covered.

From: Isaiah Zerbst | Created on: 8/23/2012 10:17:36 PM

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so different
Thank you soooo much for reviewing my story!! I read yours on my spare time, big fan.  You have such an awesome gift, I hope you write a book or series someday, it'd be a best-seller no doubt.
I LOVE everything you write becuase it's so different from all the stories all of us read daily, they all have an unexpected and mind blowing ending.  I would love to know how you get these ideas or what inspires you, gets your "creative juices flowing". Haha, I love how Anya likes to use big words, it makes the story so much funner (funner should be a word).  In a way the characters kind of remind me of the ones in the "Secret Series", "The Name of This Book is Secret" (that's the name :b).  Well I really enjoyed this story and am giving it a five like every other story you write :)

From: Hannah Musgrave | Created on: 8/21/2012 2:41:31 PM

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Nice story
I liked the story and I can understand if one of the characters has a propensity for using big words, but I see no reason why the narrator should be doing the same. In addition, the ending left me a little confused. I mean, was there some moral to the story or something?

From: D. Wayne Moore | Created on: 5/23/2012 2:21:58 PM

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Maddy at her best!
I just loved this story!  The characters feel so real!  Especially how some kids like to use big words!  Totally believable!  Anya reminded me of Hermonie from the Harry Potter series!

I can see this one spinning into a book!  Great read!  I love an adventure and want to know more of what happened!!

From: Dean Kutzler | Created on: 5/23/2012 10:29:15 AM

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Big words
I think the story was good, I just assumed that these were kids, young enough to have a club, and argue what it would be called. The only thing I found myself getting hung on were the words used. Between it seeming that for young kids it was a little unnatural for them to be talking that way, and thinking that the mood of certain scenes was lessened by the words that were used to describe it. I read somewhere that most successful authors write between a 5th and 7th grade level, and me at 26 yrs old had a hard time staying on track with the story with the vocabulary. This is that website---- http://www.readabilityformulas.com/freetests/six-readability-formulas.php
Anyway I did enjoy it, thanks for sharing, looking forward to more.

From: James Blackford | Created on: 5/5/2012 1:43:57 PM

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Really quite good :)
After months of not being on this website I got your message you sent me in February and so now I am reading  your works. Just got to say (your a beginner writer right?) if so, this story was really good. Good idea, good characters which seemed to contrast yet compare with each other and just.. they were memorable.
There were some parts where I felt like you were using too complicated description or too big of words which I didn't know which, if you had used them as dialogue for one of your characters would have made since but since you didn't it would have been better if you had used simpler explanations and descriptions in the future. :)
Otherwise, great story! I would like to see a longer version of this if you could, that's be cool

From: Daniel Fansler | Created on: 4/25/2012 5:09:06 PM

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